In Memory
by slim and a little bit sexy
Summary: The passage of time. Of Halloween. Of Lily and James.


31 October 1971

It's the first Halloween Lily Evans has been away from home and she finds it magical.

So maybe she misses her parents quite a bit and poor Sev gets picked on but there's sweet upon sweet at the table and the jack o lanterns are floating and she's giddy with delight. Mary Macdonald tells a joke and she's laughing even though it really wasn't that funny. Because that's what Halloween at Hogwarts does to you. There are candles and pumpkins and real ghosts and she can't help but think it's perfect. Her stomach is full and she feels like she's about to burst but takes another treacle tart anyways (she was quickly finding it to be a favorite).

"Evans you look particularly beautiful with that treacle tart in your hand. It's my favorite, you know, so we must be made for each other –" Lily drops the tart onto Marlene McKinnon's plate and shoots a glare at the mischievous boy's smirking face.

"Sod off Potter, or I'll shove that tart up your nose."

But not even Potter could ruin her night.

31 October 1973

It's Lily's third Halloween at Hogwarts and she's content. She's missing the feast, but who cares because she and Sev are finally spending time together again. He's been avoiding her lately, saying he's been busy studying, but she sees him with those big blokes from the year above them and she doesn't know what to think.

But none of that matters now, not when they've got an array of treats from the Great Hall at their feet. The moon is bright and they're the only ones in the room. Sev is actually smiling and Lily grins back because he's her best friends and this is the kind of stuff they've always dreamed of. Witches and wizards and magic and together. It's Halloween, they're somewhere they belong, and the castle glows with laughter.

"Hey Sev, do you ever –"

"Evans! I've been looking for you! You missed the feast! And is that Snivellus I spy dripping grease on the floor?"

"Potter, you stupid bully, just leave him alone!"

The moment is ruined, and Lily feels anger bubbling in the pit of her stomach.

31 October 1975

Lily is a fifth year, it's Halloween again, and she is sick. She gotten caught in a storm the day before walking back from the greenhouses, and she really wishes she had been wearing a coat, because then she wouldn't be stuck in her dorm coughing up a lung. She's alone in the common room, wrapped in a blanket, lonely and miserable. Her nose is dripping, and her hair is a rat's nest, and she feels disgusting.

There's a bark of laughter from the staircase and she groans. It could belong to no one but Sirius Black, and wherever he was Potter wasn't far behind.

"Evans, darling, we heard you were sick and decided you needed some cheering up, so we brought you a gift!" Lily glances up, surprised. There in front of her is Potter, along with his three friends, arms laden with goodies. Remus smiles at her warmly, and her mouth turns up at the sight of her fellow prefect bearing her favorite foods.

So the four Marauders join her on the couch (they're a bit squished, but Lily doesn't complain) and Lily doesn't feel quite so lonely anymore.

"Does this act of kindness earn me a date, Lily-flower?"

Maybe Lily was enjoying his company for the time being, but she still hated him.

31 October 1977

It's Lily's last Halloween as a Gryffindor, but she is crying. Tears drip onto the letter in her shaking hands as she sits alone in the Head's dorm. _We regret to inform you of the deaths of Henry and Jane Evans, reported at twelve o'clock Saturday morning…_.She covers her mouth with her hand as the a sob tears from her throat and the tear-stained paper drifts to the floor.

The door creaks open and Lily looks up at James Potter, who picks up the wrinkled letter from the floor. He takes one look at her red eyes and wet cheeks and promptly sits next to her, pulling her to him, her head falling onto his shoulder. The tears start soaking his jumper as he holds her, but she feels comforted, at least a little bit, because he know what it feels like. To loose someone to a hooded figure hiding in the dark, the threat of a war looming on the horizon, and the feeling of dread that ways on the heart and scares sleep away with nightmares.

For once he doesn't say anything, and Lily Evans realizes there is more to James Potter than she ever imagined.

31 October 1979

Lily is spending Halloween at the Order headquarters, and she's surrounded by family. None of them are related by blood, but she thinks of each and every one of them as a part of her all the same. The threat of Voldemort and his legion of shadows are in the corner of everyone's mind, but they're happy to just be alive and together. The past year had been hard, full of danger and terror and loss, but they'd made it through, all of them.

James grips her hand as they wade through their friends, his eyes gleaming behind his glasses. She grins as they spot Sirius, Remus, and Peter in the kitchen. Marlene and Dorcas can be heard gossiping around the corner, and Sirius, of course, is drunk, and Lily laughs because some things never change. She spies Alice and Frank in the sitting room deep in conversation with Professor Dumbledore, and the Prewett twins are nearby, conversing in hushed tones with troublesome grins on the lips.

Lily looks up at James, and he grins at her, a laugh threatening to escape from his throat. He leans down to kiss her as Sirius pulls a face in the background, and Lily smiles into the kiss, because there's nowhere else she'd rather be.

"Lily –" Lily looks at James as he breaks the kiss and clears his throat nervously.

"Will you, uh, you know, um –" She can feel the warmth spreading from her stomach, and she bites her lip to try and stop herself from smiling. She knows what's coming next, and she's never wanted anything more.

"Lily Evans, will you marry me?"

She throws herself into his arms in way of answer as the people around her explode with whistles and cheers.

"Evans, you never answered the question!"

"Potter, you idiot, of course I will. I've been yours since the beginning." And she means it.

31 October 1981

It's Harry's second Halloween, and Lily and James are hiding. They pretend everything is okay, but their smiles are stretched to0 wide, and their laughs sound just the slightest bit fake. They're hiding from a man who would do anything for power, and they're terrified because he's after them, after their son. Harry, who is the beacon of sunlight and joy and hope in the days that grow darker and darker. Harry, the one thing keeping them from falling as their friends disappear one by one. The only reason they are able to stand staying in this house day in and day out with no one but Sirius and the cat for company. Little Harry is the reason for all of it, but Lily doesn't care because she would do anything, anything for the little boy who looks like James but blinks back at her with green eyes just like her own.

And even though Lily is scared, she has never felt more love, for the baby lying in her arms and the man with the permanently untidy hair and arms around her waist. This little family is her whole world, tiny cottage and all.  
She's about to head upstairs to put Harry to bed when the front door crashes, and "Lily take Harry and run, it's him!" and it all happens so fast. There's a flash of green light out of the corner of her eye, and she sobs because she knows his wand is in the kitchen not in his hand, but she doesn't turn around. She runs, runs for her husband who's the bravest man she knows, and for baby Harry, because she loves them more than she can even explain.

She runs for all its worth, but she's cornered and all she can do is beg.

"Please, no, not Harry, not Harry!" And even though she knows there's no way out, she stand her ground, because she loves the little boy behind her and the man on the floor on the stairs, and love is all she has.


End file.
